the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
