did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
