i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
