Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
