fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
