I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
everyone is single if you try hard enough
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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