So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
