Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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