Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize
