I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
