i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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