How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Randomize