Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
