It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
