Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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