i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
should my penis look like a turkey
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
