We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
