idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
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