Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
