Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Randomize
