I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Randomize
