she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
