Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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