Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
