The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize