Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Randomize