just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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