3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
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