I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Boobs speak an international language.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
my liver is dry heaving
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
