if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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