Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Randomize
