There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
