I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I smell stomach acid.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
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