I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
