just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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