You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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