So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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