Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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