yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
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