I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
