i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
