doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize