Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
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