I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Randomize
