Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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