I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
