my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I love you. Go after that dick
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
