I need to stop coming to work sober
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I would fuck him just for his dog
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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