and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
