The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Randomize
